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I’m Just Not Sure

Called To Write
December 16, 2020
A Little Claim to a Once-Small Fame
December 24, 2020

I'm Just Not Sure

Day was I'd say with certainty
Just how I knew things to be
I'd been there and done it enough
You could bet your life on me

I knew most of the state's laws
From years of study and enforcement
I was familiar with land and roads
Trust me. Count on my endorsement

I could tell you how to get somewhere
And just how long it would take
I was the confident, go-to guy
I weren't nobody's cupcake

Part of being a man I thought
Was bein' confident in your speech
A man should never be in a quandary
His words must inspire and teach

Youth has a way of doin’ that
Causin’ a man to be self assured
I reckon it's typically caused by
Early onset of manhood bein' allured

I ain't exactly no wise ol’ sage
These opinions are strictly my own
Just some notions from ponderin’
As through decades I've grunted and grown

There are sweet periods here 'n there
When an outta' work brain will drift
Ol' Tumbleweed called it, "Windshield time"
Enlightenment is the occasional gift

It's what a man does while strugglin’
‘Tween peach fuzz and gray stubbles
He ponders a' sippin' and cigarin'
Sometimes burstin’ boyhood bubbles

See, a boy will set his eyes on
Other males as he's growin’ up
He natcherly seeks manly approval
Whilst tumblin’ his years as a pup

More often than not it seems
A boy's body'll reach to manhood
Years before his life experience
Gives him wisdom he's understood

Somewhere along the journey
God willin', a man matures
Lady Wisdom reaches down and
Starts rewardin' as he endures

What I've been considerin’ lately
When contemplatin’ my ways a lot
Is, when stating an absolute fact
After a pause there's a tenuous caveat

I'll say something like this
"You head south for three, four miles
Until you see a big red barn then
Turn left just past the county rock piles"

Pause, pause, purse lips
Whilst my certainty gets rearranged
Then I'll wink, corners of mouth upturned
"That is, if things haven't changed"

Call it wisdom, humility or both
We should get more of each with age
As arrogance an’ peacock struttin'
Begin, increasingly, to disengage

Cain't say I'm particular proud
Of bein' so late to savvy-arrivin'
A feller would'a expected sooner
Considerin' how hard I'd been a'strivin'

Anyway son, here's at least one thing
You can trust me on that's pure
Men get wiser and humbler with age
But then, of course I'm just not sure

By, Rik Goodell

© 2020

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